A few days ago, I had my latest appointment for spiritual direction. The meeting was insightful as usual, but in a different sort of way. I talked about my feeling of being drawn to cultivating community, to broadening friendships and relationships, and how integral the life of my parish of Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton was becoming to my own.
Instead of an entire chapter in a particular book of the Bible to ponder and study until the next meeting, I was given only 12 verses (Matthew 14:22-33 to be exact). This is the familiar story of Jesus walking across the water, and Peter giving it a try, but failing out of fear. I was challenged to think about what's in my boat, and to pray for the "double graces" of courage and generosity. As I left, I didn't really think too much about what my pondering, thinking, reading, praying, etc. was going to look like in the coming weeks. (Little did I know that God's "sense of humor" was going to begin showing itself the very next day!)
Over the last few days in particular, I have begun to realize that this "assignment" is going to take a lot more work than it seemed on the surface. I decided that the best thing to do would be to get as much down in writing as I can to try to keep things connected and at least somewhat organized. I should have started sooner, but
hindsight is always 20-20! Thoughts and events are happening already that I believe are leading me somewhere important. I have a feeling that what I may learn about myself is going to be more detailed and deeper than any of the previous meditations. I'm far from knowing whether it will be something small and quiet, or big and bold. Either way, I am looking forward to finding out! It hasn't even been underway for a week yet, but it is already becoming quite an interesting trip! Stay tuned if you're interested - I'm due for one of those "nights that become mornings" soon, which will give me lots of time to blog!
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